the apology OF sir Francis bacon in certain imputation concern the late earl  of essex write to the right Honora ble his very good lord the earl of  Devonshire lord lieutenant of Ireland TO the right honourable his very good  lord the earl of Devonshire lord lieutenant of ire land it may please your  good lordship I can be ignorant and ought to be sen sible of the wrong which I  sum stain in common speech as if I have be false or unthankful to that noble  but unfortunate earl the earl of Essex and for satisfy the vulgar sort I do  not so much regard it though I love a good name but yet as a handmaid and  attendant of honesty and virtue for I be of his opinion that say pleasant that  it be a shame to he that be a suitor to the mistress to make love to the wait  woman and therefore to woo or court c mon fame otherwise then it follow on  honest course I for my part find not my self fit nor dispose but on the other  side there be no worldly thing that concern my self which I hold more dear  then the good opinion of certain person among which there be none I will more  Willing give satisfaction unto then to your lordship first because you love my  l of Essex and there before will not be partial towards I which be part of  that I desire next because it have ever plea say you to show your self to I a  honourable friend and so no baseness in I to seek to satisfy you and last  because I know your lordship be excel lently ground in the true rule and habit  of duty of morals tie which must be they which shall decide this matter  wherein my l my defence needs to be but simple and brief namely that  whatsoever I do concern that action and proceed be do in my duty and service  to the queen and the state in which I will not show my self false heart nor  faint heart for any man sake live for every honest man that have his heart  well plant will forsake his king rather then forsake God forsake his friend  rather then forsake his king and yet will forsake any earthly standard thy yea  and his own life in some case rather then forsake his friend I hope the world  have not forget these degree else the heathen say friend usque and aras shall  judge they and if any man shall say I do officious intrude my self into that  business because I have no ordinary place the like may be say of all the  business in of fact that pass the hand of the learned Council either of state  or revenue these many year wherein I be continual lie use for as your lordship  may remember the queen know her strength so well as she look ed her word shall  be a war rant and after the manner of the choice prince before her do not  always tie her trust to place but do sometime divide private favour from  office and I for my part though I be not so unseen in the world but I know the  condition be subject to envy and peril yet because I know again she be  constant in her favour and make a end where she begin and especial because she  uphold I with ex extraordinary access and other demonstration of confidence  and grace I resolve to endure it in expectation of better but my scope and  desire be that your lordship will be please to have the honourable patience to  know the truth in some parti cularity of all that pass in this cause wherein I  have any part that you may perceive how honest a heart I ever bear to my  sovereign and to my country and to that noble man who have so well deserve of  I and so well accept of my desert vings who fortune I can remember without  much grief but for any action of I to ward he there be nothing that pass I in  my life time that come to my remembrance with more clearness and less check of  conscience for it will appear to your lordship that I be not only not opposite  to my lord of Essex but that I do occupy the utmost of my wit and adventure my  fortune with the queen to have reinte grate his and so continue faithful and  industrious till his last fatal impatience for so I will call it after which  day there be not time to work for he though the same my affection when it can  not work on the subject proper go to the next with no ill effect towards some  oh the who I think do rather not know it then not acknowledge it and this I  will assure your lordship I will leave nothing un tell that be truth for any  enemy that I have to add on the other side I must reserve much which make for  I in many respect of duty which I esteem above my credit and what I have here  set down to your lordship I pro test as I hope to have any part in God favour  be true it be well know how I do many year since dedicate my travel and study  to the use and as I may term it service of my lord of Essex which I pro test  before God I do not ma king election of he as the like lie mean of I own and  vancement but out of the hu mor of a man that ever from the time I have any  use of reason whether it be read upon good book or upon the exam ple of a good  father or by nam ture I love my country more then be answerable to my for tune  and I hold at that time my l to be the fit instrument to do good to the state  and there before I apply my self to he in a manner which I think happen rare  among man for I do not only labour careful and put on striously in that he set  I about whether it be matter of advice or otherwise but neglect the queen  service I own for tune and in a sort my vocation I do nothing but advice and  ru to drive with my self to the best of my understanding proposi tions and  memorial of any thing that may concern his lordship honour fortune or sir vice  and when not long after I enter into this course my bro there mr Anthony Bacon  come from beyond the sea be a gentleman who ability the world take knowledge  of for matter of state special for reign I do likewise knit his sir vice to be  at my L^ds dispose and on the otherside I must and will ever acknowledge my  lord love trust and favour towards I last of all his Proserpine mollity have  infeofed I of land which I sell for eighteen hun dread pound to master Reynold  Nicholas and I think be more worth and that at such a time and with so kind  and noble cir cumstances as the manner be as much as the matter which though  it be but a idle place of retirement on yet because I be not will ling to be  short in commemo ration of his benefit I will presume to trouble your lord  ship with the relate to you the manner of it after the queen have deny I the  solicitor place for the which his lord ship have be a long and earnest suitor  on my behalf it please he to come to I from rich mond to twicknam park and  break with I and say mr Bacon the queen have deny I the place for you and have  place another I know you be the least part of your own mat to but you fare ill  because you have choose I for your mean and dependence you have spend your  time and think in my matter I die these be his we ry word if I do not somewhat  towards your fortune you shall not deny to accept a piece of land which I will  bestow up on you my answer I remember be that for my fortune it be no great  matter but that his lordship offer make I call to mind what be wont to be say  when I be in France of the duke of Guise that he be the great usurer in France  because he have turn all his e state into obligation meaning that he have  leave himself nothing but only have bind number of person to he now my lord  say I I will not have you he mitate his course nor turn your state thus by  great gift into ob ligations for you will find many bid debtor he bid I take  no care for that press it where upon I say my lord I see I must be your  homager and hold land of your gift but do you know the manner of do homage in  law always it be with a save of his faith to the king and his other lord and  therefore my l say I I can be no more you then I be and it may be with the  ancient save and if I grow to be a rich man you will give I leave to give it  back to some of your unreward ed follower but to return sure I be though I can  arrogate no thing to my self but that I be a faithful remembrance to his  lordship that while I have most credit with he his fortune go on best and yet  in two main point we always direct and contradictory differ which I will  mention to your lordship because it give light to all that follow the one be I  ever set this down and that the only course to be hold with the queen be by  servility ousness observance and I re member I will usual engage confident  that if he will take that course constant and with choice of good particular  to express it the queen will be bring in time to assuerus question to ask what  shall be do to the man that the king will honour meaning that her goodness be  without limit where there be a true concurrence which I know in her nature to  be true my lord on the otherside have a settle oh pinion that the queen can be  bring to nothing but by a kind of necessity and seller thy and I will remember  when by violent course at any time he have get his will he will ask I now sir  who prin ciples be true and I will a gain say to he my lord these course be  like to hot water they will help at a pang but if you use they you shall spoil  the stomach and you shall be fain still to make they strong and strong and yet  in the end they will less their open ration with much other variety wherewith  I use to touch that string another point be that I always vehement dissuade he  from seek greatness by a military dependence or by a popular dependence as  that which will breed in the queen jealousy in himself presumpti on and in the  state to confuse on and I do usual compare they to Icarus two wing which be  join on with wax and will make he when ture to soar too high and then fail he  at the height and I will further say unto he my lord stand upon two foot and  fly not upon two wing the two foot be the two kind of justice commutative and  distributive use your greatness for advance of merit and for tue and relieve  wrong and burden you shall needs no other be or fineness but he will tell I  that opinion come not from my mind but from my robe but it be very true that I  that never mean to enthral my self to my lord of Essex nor any other man more  then stand with the public good do though I can little prevail divert he by  all mean possible from course of the war and popularity for I see plain the  queen must either live or die if she live then the time will be as in the  declination of a old prince if she die the time will be as in the be ginning  of a new and that if his lordship do rise too fast in these course the time  may be than gerous for he and he for they nay I remember I be thus plain with  he upon his voyage to the land when I see every spring put forth such action  of charge and provocation that I say to he my lord when I come first unto you  I take you for a physician that desire to cure the disease of the state but  now I doubt you will be like those physician which can be content to keep  their pa tients low because they will always be in request which plainness he  nevertheless take very well as he have a ex cellent be and be patien tissimus  very and assure I the case of the realm require it and I think this speech of  I and the like renew of terwards prick he to write that apology which be in  many man hand but this difference in two point so main and material breed in  process of time a this continuance of privateness as it be the manner of man  seldom to communicate where they think their course not appro ved between his  lordship and my self so as I be not call nor advice with for some year and a  half before his lordship go into Ireland as in former time yet nevertheless  touch his go into Ireland it plea say he express and in a set manner to desire  I opinion opinion and counsel at which time I do not only dissuade but protest  against his go tell ling he with as much so big as to be a cart mency and  asseveration as I can that absence in that kind will exulcerate the queen mind  whereby it will not be possible for he to carry himself so as to give her  sufficient contentment nor for her to carry her self so as to give he  sufficient count nance which will be ill for her ill for he and ill for the  state and because I will omit no argument I remem ber I stand also upon the   of facio culty of the action set be before he out of history that the Irish  be such a enemy as the ancient Gaul or Briton or germane be and that we see  how the Roman who have such discipline to govern their soldier and such  donative to encourage they and the whole world in a manner to levy they yet  when they come to deal with enemy which place their roar  city only in liberty  and the sharpness of their sword and have the natural and elemental advantage  of wood and bog and hardness of body they ever find they have their hand full  of they and there before conclude that go over with such expectation as he do  and through the churlishness of the enterprise not like to answer it will  mighty dimi nish his reputation and many other reason I use so as I be sure I  never in any thing in my life time deal with he in like earnestness by speech  by wri ting and by all the mean I can devise for I do as plain see his  overthrow chain as it be by destiny to that journey as it be possible for a  man to ground a judgement upon future contingent but my lord how soever his  ear be open yet his heart and resolution be shut against that advice whereby  his ruin may have be pre vent after my lord go I see then how true a prophet I  be in regard of the evident alteration which natural suc ceeded in the queen  mind and thereupon I be still in watch to find the best occasion that in the  weakness of my power I can either take or minister to pull he out of the fire  if it have be possible and not long of to I think I see some oh virtue thereof  which I bee prehend ready a particu larity I think beknown to very few and the  which I do the ra there relate unto your lordship because I hear it shall be  talk ed that while my lord be in Ireland I reveal some mat to against he or I  can tell what which if it be not a mere slander as the rest be but have any  though never so little colour be sure upon this occasion the queen one day at  nonesuch a little as I re member before cuff come over I attend on her show a  passionate distaste of my lord proceed in Ireland as if they be unfortunate  with out judgement contemptuous and not without some private end of his own  and all that may be and be please as she speak of it to many that she trust  least so to fall into the like speech with I whereup on I who be still awake  and true to my ground which I think sure for my lord good say to this effect  ma dam I know not the particu lars of estate and I know this that prince  action must have no abrupt period or restricted once but otherwise I will  think that if you have my lord of Essex here with a white staff in his hand as  my lord of lei cester have and continue he still about you for society to your  self and for a honour and ornament to your attendance and court in the eye of  your people and in the eye of for reign ambassador then be he in his right  element for to discontent he as you do and yet to put arm and power in to his  hand may be a kind of temptation to make he prove cumbersome and unruly and  therefore if you will to place upon good end  send for he and satisfy he with  honour here near you if your affair which as I have say I be not acquaint with  will permit it I think be the best way which course your lordship know if it  have be take then all have be well and no contempt in my lord come over nor  continuance of these jealousy which that employment of ire land breed and my  lord here in his former greatness well the next news that I hear be that my  lord be come over and that he be commit to his Chamber for leave ire land  without the queen licence this be at nonesuch where as my duty be I come to  his lordship and talk with he private about a quarter of a hour and he ask I  opinion opinion of the course be take with he I tell he my lord nubecula be  quickly to go over it be but a miss but shall I tell your lordship it be as  miss be if it go upward it may hap cause a shower if downward it will clear up  and therefore good my lord carry it so as you take away by all mean all  ombrages and if stasts from the queen especi alley if I be worthy to advice  you as I have be by your self think and now your question import the  continuance of that opinion observe point first make not this cessation or  peace which be conclude with Tyrone as a service wherein you glow ry but as a  shuffle up of a prosecution which be not very fortunate next represent not to  the queen any necessity of estate whereby as by a coercion or wrench she shall  think her self enforce to send you back into Ireland but leave it to her three  seek access importune opportune serious sport e very way I remember my lord be  Willing to hear I but speak very few word and shake his head sometime as if he  think I be in the wrong but sure I be he do just contrary in every one of  these three point after this during the while since my lord be commit to my  lord keeper I come diverse time to the queen as I have use to do about cause  of her revenue and law business as be well know by reason of which access  accord to the ordinary cham rities of court it be gi when out that I be one of  they that incense the queen against my lord of Essex these speech I can tell  nor I will not think that they grow any way from her majesty own speech who  memory I will ever honour if they do she be with God and wretched people  be  ab ill lie to hurt de who non to be able to express grief but I must give this  testimony to my lord Cecil that one time in his house at the Savoy he deal  with I direct and say to I cousin I hear it but I believe it not that you  shall do some ill office to my lord of Essex for my part I be mere passive and  not active in this action and I follow the Q and that heavy and I lead her not  my lord of Essex be one that in nature I can consent with as well as with any  one livre ving the queen indeed be my so veraign and I be her creature I may  not lose her and the same course I will wish you to take whereupon I satisfy  he how far I be from any such mind and as sometime it come to pass that man  inclination be open more in a toy then in a serious matter a little before  that time be about the mid dle of Michaelmas term her majesty have a purpose  to dine at my lodge at twicknam park at which time I have though I profess not  to be a poet prepa read a sonnet direct tend allude to draw on her Maje sty  reconcilement to my lord which I remember also I show to a great person and  one of my lord near friend who come mend it this though it be as I say but a  toy yet it show plain in what spirit I a wooer dead that I be ready not on lie  to do my l good office but to publish and declare my self for he and never be  so go round vicious of any thing in my life time as I be to have carry some  token or favour from her majesty to my lord use all the be I have both to  procure her majesty to send and my self to be the messenger for as to the  former I fear not to allege to her that this proceed to ward my lord be a  thing to ward the people very implau sible and therefore wish her majesty  however she do yet to discharge her self of it and to lie it upon other and  therefore that she shall inter mix her proceed with some immediate grace from  her self that the world may take know ledge of her princely nature and  goodness lest it shall alie nate the heart of her people from her which I do  stand up on know well that if she once relent to send or visit those  demonstration will prove matter of substance for my lord good and to draw that  employment upon my self I advice her majesty that when soever God shall move  her to turn the light of her favour to ward my lord to make battle standard  fication to he thereof that her majesty if she do it not in person will at the  least use some such mean as may not entitle themselves to any part of the  thank as person that be think mighty with her to work her or to bring her  about but to use some such as can not be think but a mere conduct of her own  goodness but I can never prevail with her though I be persuade she see plain  whereat I level lead but she plain have I in jealousy that I be not she entire  but still have inward and deep respect towards my lord more then stand at that  time with her will and pleasure about the same time I remem ber a answer of I  in a mat to which have some affinity with my lord cause which though it grow  from I go after about in other name for her majesty be mighty incense with  that book which be dedicate to my lord of Essex be a story of the first year  of king Henrythe four think it a to sit ous prelude to put into the peo ples  head boldness and faction say she have a opinion that there be treason in it  and ask ed I if I can not find any place in it that may be draw within case of  treason whereto I answer for treason sure I find none but for felony we ry  many and when her majesty hasty ask I wherein I tell her the author have  commit very apparent theft for he have take most of the sentence of Cornelius  Tacitus and translate they into English and put they into his text and another  time when the queen will not be per swaded that it be his write who name be to  it but that it have some more mischievous author and say with great  indignation that she will have he rack to produce his au thor I reply nay  madam he be a doctor never rack his person but rack his style let he have pen  ink and paper and help of book and be en join to continue the story where it  break off and I will undertake by collect the style to judge whether he be the  author or no but for the main matter sure I be when the queen at any time ask  I opinion of my lord case I ever in one tenor say unto her that they be fault  which the law may term contempt because they be the transgress sion of her  particular direction and instruction but then what defence may be make of they  in regard of the great in terest the person have in her ma jesties favour in  regard of the greatness of his place and the ampleness of his Commission in  regard of the nature of the business be action of war which in common case can  be tie to strictness of equipped once in regard of the distance of the place  have also a sea between that demand and command must be subject to wind and  weather in regard of a council of state in Ireland which he have at his back  to a vow his action upon and last in regard of a good intention that he will  allege for he self which I tell her in some re ligions be hold to be a  sufficient dispensation for God come mandments much more for prince in all  these regard I beseech her majesty to be and vised again and again how she  bring the cause into any pub lick question nay I go fur there for I tell her  my lord be a eloquent and well speak man and beside his eloquence of nature or  be he have a elo quence of accident which pass say they both which be the pity  and benevolence of his have rers and therefore that when he shall come to his  answer for himself I doubt his word will have so unequal passage above they  that shall charge he as will not be for her majesty honour and therefore wish  the conclu sion may be that they may wrap it up private between themselves and  that she will restore my lord to his former attendance with some addition of  honour to take away this content but this I will never de nigh that I do show  no to assent to cion general of his be send back again into Ireland both  because it will have carry a repugnancy with my former discourse and because I  be in I own heart full perswa dead that it be not good nei there for the queen  nor for the state nor for himself and yet I do not dissuade it neither but  leave it ever as locus slippery for this particularity I do well re member  that after your lord ship be nam for the place in Ireland and not long before  your go it please her ma jesty at white hall to speak to I of that nomination  at which time I say to her sure ma dam if you mean not to employ my lord of  Essex thither again your majesty can make a better choice and be go on to show  some reason and her majesty interrupt I with great passion Essex say she  whensoever I send Essex back again into Ireland I will marry you claim it of I  whereunto I say well ma dam I will release that contract if his go be for the  good of your state immediate after the queen have think of a course which be  also execute to have somewhat publish in the star chamber for the satis  faction of the world touch my lord of Essex his restraint and my lord of Essex  not to be call to it but occasion to be take by reason of some libel then  disperse which when her majesty propound unto I I be utter against it and tell  her plain that the peo ple will say that my lord be wound upon his back and  that justice have her balance take from her which ever con sift of a  accusation and defence with many other quick and significant term to that  purpose insomuch that I remember I sad that my lord in door hunger be too hard  for her and therefore wish her as I have do before to wrap it up private and  certain I offen dead her at that time which be rare with I for I call to mind  that both the Christmas lend and easter term follow though I come diverse time  to her upon law business yet I think her face and manner be not so clear and  open to I as it be at the first and she do direct charge I that I be absent  that day at the star chamber which be very true but I allege some in  disposition of body to excuse it and du ring all the time aforesaid there be  deeply silence from her to I touch my lord of Essex cause but towards the end  of easter term her majesty break with I and tell I that she have find my word  true for that the proceed in the star cham ber have do no good but ra there  kindle factious bruit as she term they then quench ed they and therefore that  she be determine now for the sa tisfaction of the world to pro ceed against  mylord in the star chamber by a to shape on over as far as and to have my lord  bring to his answer how beit she say she will assure I that whatsoever she do  shall be towards my l and punishment nem non and destruction as indeed she  have often repeat the same phrase before whereun to I say to the end utter to  divert her madam if you will have I speak to you in this be gument I must  speak to you as friar bacon head speak that say first time be and then time be  and time will never be for certain say I it be now far to late the matter be  cold and have take too much wind where at she seem again offen dead and rise  from I and that resolution for a while continue and after in the beginning of  midsummer term I attend her and find her settle in that resolution which I  hear of all so otherwise she fall upon the like speech it be true that see no  other remedy I say to her slight why madam if you will needs have a proceed  you be best have it in some such sort as Ovid speak of his mistress be  to some degree luce patent minus to make a counsel table matter of it and  there a end which speech again she seem to take in ill part but yet I think it  do good at that time and help to divert that course of proceed by information  in the star chamber nevertheless afterward it please her to make a more solemn  matter of the proceed and some few day after when order be give that the  matter shall be hear at York house before a assembly of councillor peer and  judge some audience of man of how mollity to be admit and then do some  principal councillor send for we of the learned con cel and notify her majesty  pleasure unto we save that it be say to I open by one of they that her majesty  be not yet resolve whether she will have I forbear in the business or no and  hereupon may arise that other sinister and true speech that I hear be raise of  I how I be a suitor to be use against my lord of Essex at that time for it be  very true that I that know well what have pass between the queen and I and  what occasion I have give her both of distaste and distrust in cross her  disposition by stan ding steadfast for my l of es sex and suspect it also to  be a stratagem arise from some particular emulation I writ to her two or three  word of come plement signify to her ma jesty that if she will be plea say to  spare I in my lord of Essex cause out of the confide ration she take of my  obligati on towards he I shall reckon it for own of her great favour but  otherwise desire her Maje sty to think that I know the de agree of duty that  no parti cular obligation whatsoever to any subject can supplant or weaken  that entireness of duty that I do owe bear to her and her service this be the  good lie suit I make be a respect no man that have his wit can have omit but  nevertheless I have a further reach in it for I judge that day work will be a  full period of any bitterness or harsh smoothness between the queen and my  lord and therefore if I declare my self full accord to her mind at that time  which can not do my lord any manner of prejudice I shall keep my credit dit  with her ever after whereby to do my lord service hereup on the next news that  I hear be that we be all send for a gain and that her majesty pleasure be we  all shall have part in the business and the lord fall into distribution of our  part it be allot to I that I shall set forth some undutiful carriage of my  lord in give occasion and count nance to a seditious pamphlet as it be term  which be dedicate unto he which be the book before mention of king Henrythe  four whereup on I reply to that allotment and say to their lordship that it be  a old matter and have no manner of coherence with the rest of the charge be  mat to of Ireland and therefore that I have be wrong by bruit before this will  expose I to they more and it will be say I give in evidence I own tale it be  answer again with good show that because it be consider how I stand thy ed to  my lord of Essex there before that part be think fit test for I which do he  least hurt for that whereas all the rest be matter of charge and accusation  this only be but matter of caveat and advice on wherewith though I be in I one  mind little satisfy because I know well a man be better to be charge with some  fault then admonish of some other yet the conclusion bind king upon the queen  pleasure direct volens  not I can not avoid that part that be lie upon I which  part if in the delivery I do handle not ten derly though no man before I do in  so clear term free my lord from all disloyalty as I do that your lordship know  eth must be ascribe to the sum periour duty I do owe to the queen fame and  honour in a public proceed and part lie to the intention I have to uphold my  self in credit and strength with the queen the better to be able to do my lord  good office afterward for as soon as this day be pass I lose no time but the  very next day follow as I remember I at tend her majesty full resol ved to try  and put in ure my ut most endeavour so far as I in my weakness can give  furtherance to bring my lord again speedi lie into court and favour and know  as I suppose at least how the queen be to be use I think that to make her con  ceive that the matter go well then be the way to make her leave off there and  I remember well I say to her you have now madam obtain victory over two thing  which the grea test prince in the world can not at their will subdue the one  be over fame the other be over a great mind for sure the world be now I hope  reasonable well satisfy for my lord he do show that to abase cion towards your  majesty as I be persuade he be never in his life time more fit for your favour  then he be now therefore if your majesty will not mar it by linger but give  over at the best and now you have make so good a full point receive he again  with tenderness I shall then think that all that be pass be for the best  whereat I re member she take exceed great contentment and do of ten iterate  and put I in mind that she have ever say that her proceed shall be and repa  account and not adruinam as who say that now be the time I shall well perceive  that that say of she shall prove true and further she will I to set down in  write all that pass that day I obey her commandment and within some few day  bring her a gain the narration which I do read unto her at several after noons  and when I come to that part that set forth my lord own answer which be my  principal care I do well bear in mind that she be extrordina rily move with it  in kindness and relent towards my lord and tell I afterward speak how well I  have ex press my lord part that she perceive old love will not easy be forget  whereto I a swered sudden that I hope she mean that by her self but in  conclusion I do advice her that now she have take a represent sentation of the  matter to her self that she will let it go no further for madam say I the fire  blaze well already what shall you tumble it and be side it may please you keep  a convenienc with your self in this case for since your express dire ction be  there shall be no re gister nor clarke to take this sen tense nor no record or  memo rial make up of the proceed why shall you now do that popular which you  will not admit to be do judicial whereupon she do agree that that write shall  be suppress say and I think there be not person that ever see it but from this  time forth during the whole latter end of that summer while the court be at  nonesuch and Otlands I make it my task and scope to take and give oc casions  for my lord reintegra cion in his fortune which my intention I do also signify  to my lord assoon as ever he be at his liberty whereby I may without peril of  the queen indignation write to he and have receive from his lordship a  courteous and love acceptation of my good will and endeavour I do bee ply it  in all my access to the queen which be very many at that time and purposely  seek and wrought upon other variable pretence but only and chief for that  purpose and on the otherside I do not forbear to give my lord from time to  time faithful advertise mean what I find and what I wish and I draw for he by  his appointment some letter to her majesty which though I know well his  lordship gift and style be far better then I own yet because he rest  read it  allege that by his long restraint he be grow all most a stranger to the queen  present conceit I be ready to perform it and sure I be that for the space of  six week or two month it prosper so well as I expect continual his restore to  his attendance and I be never better welcome to the queen nor more make of  then when I speak full and bold for he in which kind the particular be exceed  many whereof for a example I will remember to your lordship one or two as at  one time I call to mind her majesty be speak of a fall low that undertake to  cure or at least to ease my brother of his gout and ask I how it go forward  and I tell her majesty that at the first he re ceived good by it but after in  the course of his cure he find himself at a stay or rather worse the queen say  again I will tell you Baconthe error of it the manner of these physiti once  and especial these Empe rick be to continue one kind of medicine which at the  first be proper be to draw out the ill humour but after they have not the  discretion to change their medicine but apply still draw medicine when they  shall rather intend to cure and corroborate the part good lord madam say I how  wise and apt can you speak and discern of physic minister to the body and  consider not that there be the like occasion of physic minister to the mind as  now in the case of my lord of Essex your princely word ever be that you intend  e for to reform his mind and not ruin his fortune I know well you can but  think that you have draw the humour be sufficient ently and therefore it be  more then time and it be but for doubt of mortify or exulcerating that you do  bee ply and minister strength and comfort unto he for these same gradation of  you be fit to corrupt then correct a nigh mind of greatness and anon there  time I remember she tell I for news that my lord have write unto her some very  du tiful letter and that she have be move by they and when she take it to be  the abundance of the heart she find it to be but a preparative to a suit for  the renew of his farm of sweet wine whereunto I reply oh madam how do your ma  jesty consture these thing as if these two can not stand well together which  indeed nature have plant in all creature for there be but two sympa thigh the  one towards perfection on the other towards prefer vation that to perfection  as the iron con death to the load stone that to preservation as the vine will  creep towards a stake or prop that stand by it not for any love to the stake  but to uphold it self and there before madam you must keep apart guish my lord  desire to do you service be as to his perfection on that which he think he  self to be bear for where as his desire to obtain this thing of you be but for  a sustentation and not to trouble your lord ship with many other particu lars  like unto these it be at the self same time that I do draw with my lord  privity and by his appointment two letter the one write as from my bro there  the other as a answer return from my lord both to be by I in secret manner  show ed to the queen which it plea say my lord very strange to mention at the  bar the scope of which be but to represent and picture forth unto her ma jesty  my lord mind to be such as I know her majesty will fain have have it which  letter whosoever shall see for they can now be retract or alter be by reason  of my brother or his lordship servant delivery long since come into diverse  hand let he judge especial if he know the queen and do remember those time  whether they be not the labour of one that seek to bring the queen about for  my lord of Essex his good the troth be that the issue of all his deal grow to  this that the queen by some slackness of my lord as I imagine like he worse  and worse and grow more incense towards he then she remember belike the  continual and incessant and confident speech and course that I have hold on my  lord side become utter alienate from I and for the space of at least three  month which be between Michaelmas and new year tide follow will not so much as  look on I but tur n away from I with express and purpose like discountenance  wheresoever she see I and at such time as I desi read to speak with her about  law business ever send I forth very slight refusal inso much as it be most  true that he mediate after new year tide I desire to speak with her and be  admit to her I deal with her plain and say ma dam I see you withdraw your  favour from I and now I have lose many friend for your sake I shall lose you  too you have put I like one of those that the Frenchman call enfans perdus  that serve on foot before horse man so have you put I into matter of envy  without place or without strength and I know at chess a pawn before the king  be ever much play upon a great many love I not because they think I have be  against my lord of Essex and you love I not because you know I have be for he  yet will I never repent I that I have deal in simplicity of heart towards you  both without re speck of caution to my self and therefore alive a seer  to pass away if I do break my neck I shall do it in a manner as master  Dorrington do it which walk on the battlement of the church many day and take  a view survey where he shall fall and so madam say I I be not so simple but  that I take a prospect of I over throw only I think I will tell you so much  that you may know that it be faith and not folly that bring I into it so I  will pray for you upon which speech of I utter with some passion it be true  her majesty be exceed more ved and accumulate a number of kind gracious word  upon I and will I to rest upon this agreeableness of me be sufficient and a  number of other sensible ten der word and demonstration such as more can not  be but as touch my lord of Essex ne word indeed  whereupon I depart rest then  determi n to meddle no more in the matter as that that I see will overthrow I  and not be able to do he any good and thus I make I own peace with I own  confidence at that time and this be the last time I see her majesty be before  the eight of February which be the day of my lord of es sex his misfortune  after which time for that I perform at the bar in my public service your  lordship know by the rule of duty that I be to do it ho nestly and without  prevarica cion but for any put my self into it I protest before God I never  move neither the queen nor any person live concern my be use in the service  either of evidence or examination but it be mere lie upon I with the rest of  my fellow and for the time which pass I mean be tween the arraignment and my  lord suffer I well remem ber but I be once with the queen at what time though  I dare not deal direct for my lord as thing then stand yet general I do both  commend her majesty mercy term it to her as a excellent balm that do continual  distil from her sovereign hand and make a excellent odour in the sense of her  people and not only so but I take hardiness to make thin eat not the fact for  that I dare not but the danger tell her that if some base or cruel mind person  have enter in to such a action it may have cause much blood and come bustion  but it appear well they be such as know not how to play the malefactor and  some other word which I now omit and as for the rest of the carriage of my  self in that service I have many hono rabble witness that can tell that the  next day after my lord arraignment by my diligence and information touch the  quality and nature of the offen dor six of nine be stay which otherwise have  be at taint I bring their lord ship letter for their stay after the jury be  swear to pass up on they so near it go and how careful I be and make it my  part that whosoever be in trouble about that matter as soon as ever his case  be be sufficient ently know and define of may not continue in restraint but be  set at liberty and many other part which I be well as sure of stand with the  duty of a honest man but indeed I will not deny for the case of sir though  mass smith of London the Q de manding my opinion of it I tell her I think it  be as hard as many of the rest but what be the reason because at that time I  have see only his ac cusation and have never be present at any examination of  his and the matter so stand king I have be very true to my service if I have  not deliver that opinion but after ward upon a re-examination of some that  charge he who weaken their own testimony especial hear himself viva voice I go  instant to the Q out of the soundness of my con science not regard what oh  pinion I have former deliver tell her majesty I be satisfy and resolve in my  conscience that for the reputation of the action the plot be to con tenance  the action further by he in respect of his place then they have indeed any  interest or intelligence with he it be very true also about that time her  majesty take a like of my pen upon that which I have do before concern the  proceed at York house and likewise upon some other declaration which in former  time by her appointment I put in write command I to pen that book which be pub  lished for the better be satisfied on of the world which I do but so as never  secretary have more particular and express direction and instruction in e very  point how to guide my hand in it and not only so but after that I have make a  first draught thereof and display dead it to certain principal councillor by  her majesty appointment it be peruse weigh censure alter and and make almost  anew write accord to their lordship better consideration wherein their  lordship and my self both be as religious and grievous ous of truth as  desirous of satis faction and my self indeed give only word and from of style  in pursue their direction and after it have pass their allow once it be again  exact peru say by the queen her self and some alteration make again by her  appointment nay and after it be set to print the queen who as your lordship  know as she be excellent in great matter so she be ex quisite in small and  note that I can not forget my ancient respect to my lord of Essex in term he  ever my lord of es sex my lord of Essex almost in every page of the book which  she think not fit but will have it make Essex or the late earl of Essex  whereupon of force it be print de to make new the first copy suppress by her  peremptory commandment and this my good lord to my further remembrance be all  that pass wherein I have part which I have set down as near as I can in the we  ry word and speech that be use not because they be worthy the repetition I  mean those of I own but to the end your lordship may lively and plain discern  be tween the face of truth and a smooth tale and the rather also because in  thing that pass a good while since the very word and phrase do some time bring  to my remem branc the matter wherein I report I to your honourable judgement  whether you do not see the trace of a honest man and have I be as well believe  either by the queen or by my lord as I be well hear by they both both my lord  have be fortunate and so have my self in his fortune to conclude therefore I  humble pray your lordship to pardon I for trouble you with this long narration  and that you will vouchsafe to hold I in your good opinion till you know I  have deserve or find that I shall deserve the contrary and even so I continue  at your lordship honourable commandment very humble